Torn

Torn in the inside,
I feel nothing now.
Cause I don't know what to feel right now.
Pain?Guilt?Sad? Anger?
What for?
I can't even grasp a tiny bit of my life.
nothing.
I feel empty.





you do not know my family.

Owh.

Although you were here with me almost the whole day in college,
but when you left, it really does feel weird.
Even the class was bit quiet without you.
SHEESH, make you sound important. =p
and stop sounding like you won't come back,
like what you said, " I'll be back"
=]

dotted lines.

SIGH
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SIGH
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SIGH
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SIGH
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SIGH

A facade I have to put up/on everyday, when will this end?
I'll make it through, and still will continue smiling. =)

ADUH!!!

going to be a hunch back soon. =(

dearies, tell me to sit straight if I'm hunching kay? =)

loves G6 =]

maths! chiong arh!!

WHY

why can't they see?
I'm struggling too.
I'm trying my best.
I'm not going there to play.
I'm going there to study.
Why can't they see?
Why are they locking me up in this foul cage?
blaming me for every single thing.
They have to understand that, I'm growing up.
I want my own freedom, let me have it.
The more you restrict, the more I rebel naturally.
I hate it, I really do.
So , why can't they see it?
I wonder what will make them listen.
I want them to see, to reason.

90 things o.o

Level 1
(x) Smoked A Cigarette
( ) Smoked A Cigar
(x) Kissed A Member Of The Same Sex *cheek ma*
(X) Drank Alcohol

SO FAR: 3

Level 2
(X) Are / Been In Love
( ) Been Dumped
() Shoplifted
( ) Been Fired
( ) Been In A Fist Fight

SO FAR: 4

Level 3
(x ) Had A Crush On An Older Person
(X) Skipped School
( ) Slept With A Co-worker
(X) Seen Someone / Something Die

SO FAR: 7

Level 4
(X) Had / Have A Crush On One Of Your Facebook Friends
( ) Been To Paris
( ) Been To Spain
(X) Been On A Plane
( ) Thrown Up From Drinking

SO FAR: 9

Level 5
(X) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been Snowboarding
(X) Met Someone BECAUSE Of Facebook
( ) Been in a Mosh Pit

SO FAR: 11

Level 6
( ) Been In An Abusive Relationship
(X) Taken Pain Killers
(X) Love/loved Someone Who You Cant Have
(X) Laid On Your Back And Watched Cloud Shapes Go By
( ) Made A Snow Angel

SO FAR: 14

Level 7
(X) Had A Tea Party
(X) Flown A Kite
(X) Built A Sand Castle
(X) Gone mudding
(x) Played Dress Up

SO FAR: 19

Level 8
(X) Jumped Into A Pile Of Leaves
( ) Gone Sledging
(X) Cheated While Playing A Game
(X) Been Lonely
(X) Fallen Asleep At Work / School

SO FAR: 23

Level 9
(X) Watched The Sun Set
( ) Felt An Earthquake
( ) Killed A Snake
SO FAR: 24

Level 10
(X) Been Tickled
() Been Robbed / Vandalized
(x) Been cheated on
(X) Been Misunderstood

SO FAR: 27

Level 11
(x) Won A Contest
( ) Been Suspended From School
() Had Detention
( x ) Been In A Car / Motorcycle Accident

SO FAR: 29

Level 12
( ) Had / Have Braces
(X) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) Danced in the moonlight

SO FAR: 31

Level 13
(x) Hated The Way You Look*Imokaynow*IlikethewayIlook=)
( ) Witnessed A Crime
(x) Pole Danced
(X) Questioned Your Heart
(x ) Been obsessed with post-it-notes *stillam*

SO FAR: 35

Level 14
(X) Squished Barefoot Through The Mud
(X) Been Lost
( ) Been To The Opposite Side Of The World
(X) Swam In The Ocean
(X) Felt Like You Were Dying

SO FAR: 39

Level 15
(X) Cried Yourself To Sleep
(x ) Played Cops And Robbers
(x ) Recently Colored With Crayons / Colored Pencils / Markers
(X) Sang Karaoke
(X) Paid For A Meal With Only Coins

SO FAR: 44

Level 16
(X) Done Something You Told Yourself You Wouldn't
(X) Made a Prank Phone Call
() Laughed Until Some Kind Of Beverage Came Out Of Your Nose
( ) Kissed In The Rain

SO FAR: 46

Level 17
(x ) Written A Letter To Santa Claus
( x ) Watched The Sun Set/ sun rise With Someone You Care/Cared About*intheplanewithfamily*
(X) Blown Bubbles
(X) Made A Bonfire On The Beach or anywhere

SO FAR: 50

Level 18
(X) Crashed A Party
() Have Traveled More Than 5 Days With A Car Full Of People
(X) Gone Rollerskating / Blading
(X) Had A Wish Come True
( ) Been Humped By A Monkey (O_O")

SO FAR: 53

Level 19
(x ) Worn Pearls
(x ) Jumped Off A Bridge *smallbrigdemaaa*
(X) Swore at the teacher, in front of them
( ) Swam With Dolphins

SO FAR: 56

Level 20
(X) Got Your Tongue Stuck To A Pole/Freezer/ice Cube
() Kissed A Fish
(x ) Worn The Opposite Sex's Clothes
(X) Sat On A Roof Top

SO FAR: 59

Level 21
(X) Screamed At The Top Of Your Lungs
(X) Done / Attempted A One-Handed Cartwheel
( ) Talked On The Phone For More Than 6 Hours
(X) Recently stayed Up for a while talking to someone you care about

SO FAR: 62

Level 22
( ) Picked And Ate An Apple Right Off The Tree
(x) Climbed A Tree
(X) Had/Been In A Tree House.
(X) Been scared To Watch Scary Movies Alone

SO FAR: 65

Level 23
(X) Believed In Ghosts
( ) Have had More Then 30 Pairs Of Shoes
( ) Gone Streaking
() Visited Jail

SO FAR: 66

Level 24
(X) Played Chicken
(X) Been Pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
(x ) Been Told You're Hot By A Complete Stranger
( ) Broken A Bone
(X) Been Easily Amused

SO FAR: 70

Level 25
(X) Caught A Fish Then Ate It Later
( ) Made A Porn Video/got asked to make one
(X) Caught A Butterfly
(X) Laughed So Hard You Cried
(X) Cried So Hard You Laughed

SO FAR: 74

Level 26
() Mooned/Flashed Someone
(x ) Had Someone Moon/Flash You
(X) Cheated On A Test
(X) Forgotten Someone's Name
(x ) French Braided Someones Hair
( ) Gone Skinny Dipping
(X) Been Kicked Out Of Your House
(X) Tried to hurt yourself

SO FAR: 80

Level 27
(X) Rode A Roller Coaster
(X) Went Scuba-Diving/Snorkeling
(X) Had A Cavity
(x ) Black-Mailed Someone
(X) Been Black Mailed

SO FAR: 85

Level 28
(X) Been Used
(X) Fell Going Up The Stairs*meretrip*
( ) Licked A Cat
(X) Bitten Someone*ahahaaha*
(X) Licked Someone

SO FAR: 89

Level 29
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint
( ) Had sex in the rain
(X) Flattened someone's tyres
( ) Rode your car/truck until the gas light came on
( ) Got five dollars or less worth of gas

SO FAR/TOTAL: 90

Total of 90 things , gotta go study, ciao

Let's Do This Thing

Hey sorry dearest, too busy to blog.. really, as you can see in my feb list, 4 exams in a row..
promise to update soon.
meanwhile, have fun looking at the tags.


Tagged by Jason

RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle mode.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Tag 3 friends.
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!


iF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
Shi Jie Wei Yi De Ni- Gary Cao

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Flo Rida-Low. (WTF)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Time To Dance-Step up 2 soundtrack


HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Return The Favour-Keri Hilson

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Edward's Lullaby-River Flows

WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
Bad Girl-Danity Kane. (LOL!)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Our Eyes-Teddy Geiger

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Tian Tang- Guang Liang ( LAGI WTF. LOL)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Crush - David Archuleta ( NO OKAY. - - )

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
A Little Too Not Over You-David Archuleta-(ROFL)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Memories-Dj Splash

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY
Magic Summer Night-Cascada ( I really wish. )

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Tell The World-Hillsong

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Unto You-Planet Shakers

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Tonight-Fm Static ( hmm, not bad. AHHA)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Nine in the Afternoon-Panic at the Disco. ( LOL!!! one heck of a funeral)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST??
Gimme More-Britney Spears. ( HAHA)

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
Super Human-Chris Brown. ( Wooo, superhuman stay away. =p)

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Only Human-K (shhh, don't tell nyone kay? xD)

WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
Fen Shou Kuai Le-FishLeong ( HAHAHHA! I'm still single, well, sorta =x)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Bei Pan-Gary Cao

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
LEt's do this thing. xD

Tag By itu, Cindle Jie. xD

001. Real name → LLPH , Never said I have to write full. o.O

002. Nickname(s)→ Lenn, Lenny, Na, brother's friends ( Bao Bao = =)

004. Zodiac sign → Cancer.

005. Male or female → Female.

006. Elementary → SSBR

007. Middle School →SMK(P) Methodist

008. High School →same as the above.

009. College School → TUC. *go figure*

010. Hair color → Black, gonna dye soon. GG XD.

011. Long or short → Long

012. Loud or Quiet → Depend on situation.

013. Sweats or Jeans → Both.

014. Phone or Camera → Both.

015. Health freak → So-So.o.o

016. Drink or Smoke? → Drink, *never smoke*. = =

017. Do you have a crush on someone? → *cough cough cough*

018. Eat or Drink → Both.

019. Piercings → 5, want to addd...

020. Tattoos → Still in consideration. xD

FIRSTS:
023. First piercing → 4 years old i think. o.o

024. First best friend → always my cousin. =)

025. First award → forgot.

026. First crush → same as the above.

027. First pet → DOG, duke, golden retriever. 8 years

028. First big vacation → hua liao, how i know

030. First big birthday→ All the while also big, =p stopped at form 3 i think, i have no idea why. SAD

CURRENTLY:
049. Eating → NO, hungry, waiting for food . )=

050. Drinking → Nope.

052. I'm about to → EAT and STUDY

053. Listening to → Real Player, my itune went siao

054. Plans for today → EAT AND STUDY!

055. Waiting for → Food, starvinggg

YOUR FUTURE:
058. Want kids? → Of course.

059. Want to get married? → Duhh.

060. Careers in mind → Lawyer , Forensic or Scientish in BioTech.

WHICH IS BETTER IN THE BOY/GIRL YOU LIKE?
068. Lips or eyes → Eyes

070. Shorter or taller? → Taller

072. Romantic or spontaneous → both?

073. Nice stomach or nice arms → Nice arms.

074. Sensitive or loud→ in between.

075. Hook-up or relationship → complicated. =x hope to change it soon.

076. Trouble maker or hesitant → hmmm

HAVE YOU EVER:
080. Lost glasses/contacts → do not wear any, good eyesight, and yes i tengah show off

081. Ran away from home → Nope.

082. Held a gun/knife for self defense → Nope. toy gun got =p

083. Killed somebody → nope

084. Broken someone's heart → yup.

085. Been arrested → o.o

087. Cried when someone died → grandauntie.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
089. Yourself → Sometimes.

090. Miracles → Sometimes.

091. Love at first sight → Not really.

092. Heaven → unsure

093. Santa Claus → nope

094 Tooth Fairy → nope

095. Kiss on the first date → NO

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → yup.

098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → Human can never be satisfied, no?.

099. Do you believe in God? →FREE THINKER =)

100. Post as 100 truths and tag people *not actually 100 post* → lazy to tag people. those who want to do it, feel free. gotta go¨.

Valentines. =)

OH hey,people, Happy Valentines. =)


I know I'm late , but better late than never right? =)

Smiley Smiley .

Bought this necklace for RM10 =D say it;s cute. quick =p

Gift From Jason. Thanks lot. =) seriously, and it's adorable.


Cough *smile* cough.


thanks Iggy!! =) the roses are in a vase. =)

Pre-wed Dinner.

Cousin sister was getting married. =) on Valentines.

Roasted pig, that's the only picture. nyahaha. of the food anyway.

I FINALLY GET TO MEET MY COUSSIEEEE , SCREAMMSSS

in the toilet. owh , you stupid flash.=/

Lenn and El. =D



Funneh Faces. hahaha.

Both of us, in black, with heels. =D

Me and my baby cousin. She's not the youngest, but I sayang her muchies =D



End of the post.
it's not that I'm free. it's that my brain has gone haywired. LOL.


OH hey,people, Happy Valentines. =)

I forgot

What I wanted to say. =x

You'll Never Know..

Listening and absorbed to ; David Archuleta- Somebody Out There & A Little Too Not Over You.


I seriously seriously seriously need an Ipod and Lappie.

Phone 2g, fit with gazillion songs, cannot use dy . lah.
sigh.
Lappie?
cause I seriously need it. DUH.

SIGH,
life can be so complicated when you least expected it.

I'm still clueless.
who will be my guidance?
Yo besties, where are you?
I need you all.

Oh dear

Have to buck up for piano dy..

scales still okay..

printed out the Yiruma-River Flow In You piano score.

I took like an hour just to learn 3 lines. WTDONKEY.

okay, gotta go study. =)

Genting Trip.

Went to genting on Sat, cause dad business associate was there.
No I did not go to the theme park.



Opt for this but changed, good thing too, table messy. sorry.

Playing with the colours

I think it looks ugly. mummy was right. haha.

I never said I was good.

The strong coastal wind. cheez.

coffee bean, so sweet la. =/

Whole family playing one game to get tickets.

tickets.

See that ? crazy on how people play, the guy stash RM50 at once in his card. crazy

Cai Shen.

Effect of teh water vapour.



2nd brother and I

Melvin =D

Mummy and I

Yup, I agree this looks better.

So cool eh?

It's 19.6 degree! IT dropped to 18 degree, crazy that people can actually wear mini skirts or muscle T. WTF. i mean donkey, yes donkey.

ops. wrong angle.

haha. xD during dinner.

Father and son.

=D

=D

'In our eyes, all of you will always be our babies.'

Flowerssss

=)


there, done.

Dumping everything in

BUSY!

need to eat, mum forcing me too, wash toilet, my clothes. o.o then having dinner at uncle's restaurant,then have to study for chemmy and maths, and I want to go out tomorrow as well. ARGH.

can I say I miss you? : )

photos are taking such a long time to load!!

Photos not in order. Sorry, but whatever

BE JEALOUS!!!I've got all 25 of em and I didn't need to pay a cent!


Tho I don't like the packaging, but I'm one Happy girl =D


Lalalala. *tengah Sai meng*

Sg,Wang deco


The GOLDEN MAN. WUU

Dadadedum..

Daddy and my 2nd brother's hand.

Karaoke Session with the family .

This is also one of the CAL student.

CAL's student election. tho I'm not in CAL , or whatsoever, I wonder how SAM's would look like?
I'm definitely help you RACH! =D

Vote for her. haha.

I like this tee.

French Plaits

Green Tea Ice Blended I think, Sonia's

WHAT? =p

This is TEDDY from Mr.Bean. huhuh.

Happy birthday Hon hon =p Yu Fai's Birthday cake from us.

no idea who the lady is, but she's there.


Went to restaurant beside the cinema in 3rd floor.



Totally waste of money and FAKE




Too Sweet for my liking.

ANG PAUUU




Flowers =)

I'm sorry, but I need to sort things out,
I'm confused, I need time to clear up.
I want it to be only you when I'm with you
and not someone else.