Just something.

This is not a poem, it's just something.




By seeing you online , it brightens up my day.
By seeing you offline, I'm always waiting for you to come back on online.
Last time, before heading to bed, you ALWAYS remember to greet me good nite.
And now, Not even a Bye.


WE could talk on the phone for hours.
Talking bout craps that relieves our mind.
Not worrying about anything except for waking up late the next day.

Now when we chat, we talk bout lots of things too,
but it isn't like last time,
and when we are getting to the climax,
you suddenly cut me off by saying you wanna sleep
and left me with the hung up tone.

Last time I thought I knew you, well sorta,
but now , not even close.


By writing this, doesn't mean you have to care, or mind. Sorry if I've hurt or misunderstood you, but I'm just saying what's in my thoughts. okay? somehow, this time I don't want any actions. sort off tired?? I don't know.

Just don't think of me, instead concentrate on your coming exam.. this year is important to you.

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This is something different.

Knowing you makes me think that I've got more in me,
Knowing you is always a surprise
Knowing you is like all my problems gone,
Knowing you made me fall head over heels for you.

Once together,
Everything went fine.
You treat me with care,
Like I was something fragile,
anything wrong and I'll break into pieces.

After a period of time,
Maple is all you could talk about,
During Phone calls, or outings and even chatting .
Oh What did I do to make you addicted to Maple.

You broke up with me
saying that I am a brat,
always wanting pampering,
and cause much troubles to you.

Let's keep in simple,
I'm a bitch,
You maked me back where I was long time ago,
A shy little girl,
My self-esteem lower than the floor,
Thinking that I'm the most worst person on EARTH.
Making me feel like no one deserved me
and you took me as in for sympathy.

Although I know that I'm not that,
but your words has really hurt me too much.
your harsh act has put me into dumpsters.
Advices from my friends and besties flew along like canon balls.
Telling me he's not worth my tears nor my love.
But yet, I don't know why,
I think I have, but I shouldn't have,
I fell for you hard.
and I didn't wanna let go eventho you said so,
I was still clinging on to the memories we had,
wondering to a fantasy world of mine.

After further persuasion and apologies,
I've decided to let go,
altho it's hard,
but I was willing to.
-To forget, first you have to remember.
To let go , first you really need to see it with your eyes that it's over.-

And then I started to plant a new feelin towards you,
hatred.
I refuse to talk to you,
whenever we talk, we'll end up fighting,
which puts me into a pissed off state.
Soon after, the hatred slowly turns into a dislike,
you have to admit,
He's a good friend indeed.
He's ready to hear you anytime, anywhere.
Being his friend is somehow better than being his gal
just that some things won't remain the same.

Sweet memories that I'm still keeping,
Not planning to let go either.
I accept and I am willing to let go of you,
but these sweet memories will always stay with me.

Remembering sweet times we did,
I've never regretted knowing you nor being with you.
Altho I would like to make the times with you even more memorable,
but my feelings for you will never be the same..

(last paragraph, didn't know what I was writing... heh.)

Some may say First love is memorable, unforgettable, but for me??
I think my last one had been memorable among the other(after further discussions) 3 relationship I have been into.

Some of you may not know who I'm talking about, cause I'm talking bout 2 different person here. I'm not planning to reveal who are these 2 either..

I don't care if this post has lots of mistakes, I'm not that good with words anyways.. but this is actually bout my feelings kay.. if you wanna leave comments bout my language or things I wrote, shove it up your sorry ass.. =X


-Don't act as if you know.- Screw your sorry self.


Sort off outta words.. too tired to write anymore.. wasn't planning to blog bout this actually.. was suppose to be sum other things.. anyways.. whatever.. signing off..

nitex...