Gah.

I realise something.


I don't love you anymore =D
I read a post and I saw that the blogger had similar feelings that I feel.
And I feel that she managed to describe MY feelings out as well as hers.


She is able to describe it but I am unable to.
I can't find the words.
Gah
Mayb all this while, I'm feeling this way because of the loneliness inside of me.

You know,
even if I break up with someone, I would still be their friend no matter what.. I don't believe in 'No friends to be after breaking up' that's just crap.
but I have a few which would just plainly avoid me , and when I ask for a reason, he could not give me one.


There were times when I wondered, Am I the problem? Am I such a intolerant , troublesome (inserts more) gf? Till now I have no idea. I really don't.

But WHAT I HATE THE MOST IS. yes hate not dislike. I hate it when people starts ignoring me. When they start shoving me aside. When they start to avoid me. When they start to delete me from anywhere they can. and without a reason. I hate that you know. It makes me feel ' What have I done wrong?' that kinda thing.

When I really have absolute no idea about!!! I extremely hate losing any friends .

Actually the main reason of the post is. IF you want to avoid me/delete me , whatsoever, just tell me beforehand why, or you're gonna do so, cause I hate to find it out last. I hate to know that the person I've been with, my friend , just suddenly deletes me. Most probably you have a reason, but CAN'T YOU SOLVE IT OUT WITH ME? why not be honest? INSTEAD OF DELETING ME LIKE THAT!

This isn't the first time I've been deleted or I don't know whatsoever more, it doesn't make sense but I don't care.

I have rants on the friendster blog about I don't know what I did wrong and people are avoiding/blaming me.

but now.. ARGH!

extremely pissed.

I hate hate hate people doing that.
you may think I'm harsh. hah~ don't read then, DELETE ME THEN.

who knows, I might will emo later on, and I might hid in one corner and cry.

bah. who cares. not like I care now. I just want people to be honest with me. If you don't like what I did , just tell me. I know I'll feel angry/pissed or whatever, but at least I know the truth!!!!

I can rant more, but decide not to..


-Lenna-