Of ex lovers and unforgetable memories.

Sorry to say, I really can't help it..

I still miss him lots.. I really tried to let go, to forget... but somehow, he just makes my mind go back to him..

and yes I'm jealous that he has someone else already.. I'm not sure if it's only in maple or real life.. anyhow, I'm jealous.. I'm fucking jealous, kay?

and I'm hurt... I'm hurt that he doesn't give a dam bout me nymore.. like after it ended,there was always somthing.. something..

like asking how I was or whatsoeva..

I know, i know.. I'm suppose to freaking let go right?? well, I am trying my hardest and failing my fullest on it .. for this past few days, I've been emo-ing alot..

and on monday-tuesday, went to rach's house to sleepover.. it felt so good to be with your bestest friends again. the 7 of us.. then me,rach,kw,sm started talking bout this topic..

and kw and sm made me and rach blab everything out.. when I was telling them bout the memories... some part of me was shy .. and every sentence said made me remember that particular memorable day.. and some part of me was scared and afraid.. cause I'm afraid that once I told them everything.. the memories would fade away..

and I didn't want it to fade away.. and that was when I realised... till now.. I didn't wanna let go..
it hurts to let go, to forget and yet to remember.. to remember that he's not mine anymore.. to forget the memorable memories we had? no way. I couldn't bare taking the last of our memories away. I couldn't bare to lose the memories...

It's like I'm being selfish horh?? haha.. I'm pathetic. haha. I try to make the best of my days.. and tried as hard not to think of him.. but some little things that connects to him, automatically brings back the memories.. seriously said.. I really still like him.. alot.

haha.hahahaha. unexplainable feelings.. well, these are the days when I think of him, and starts emo-ing..

now you see darren, why I say that my advice are useless?? I can't even let go of the person I LIKE, and I'm asking you to ! I don't have the authority to do that! I don't have the right to do that! sorry tho..

and Rach, all of them can wait , right ? wait for the special someone to come.. Let us all to wait together.. aite? gosh, I just saw you yesterday and I miss yoouu soo much already, you know that?? I extremely miss you.. and heck, I miss the cake as well..

Well, no matter what, I'm still gonna get on with my life, and keep trying to forget him, but not the memories I shared to him, it's just to valueable..

Just concentrate on other things.. and soon..I'll resume back to normal... treating him as a fren.. as usual.. gosh.. I hope he don read this.. but it would be amazing if he reads any one of our blogs.. lolx..

Everyone's a sinner, so am I. It makes
no difference on how much sins you make,
but it makes a difference if you realise
your sins.

I like that quote.. hmm..

I still like you.. =)

Questions asked,
Answers left untold..

This shall be mine, and mine only.....

-Lenna-